today i had two quesadillas. one from taco bell thank you eighty five cents and one that my dearest mackenzie made me at eleven p.m. for free.
i had a love affair with everything today.
i loved my religion class and my pen i found in my scriptures the one macky lent me when i took my linguistics final last winter. due to my noise cancellation earphones and apparent lack of common sense i walked into a building that everyone was rushing out of because the fire alarm was going off. i couldn't hear it. i just thought they were all rushing to the marriott center i was going to watch devotional in the jfsb because it's less of a walk. turns out there was a fire alarm. a frazzled man waved me out the door as i wrenched one of my earphones out.
nothing burned down as far as i can tell. early british literature class carried on as normal with an honest teacher who will answer you with an "i don't know" but recites middle english in a way that makes me remember the afternoon we spent in canterbury wearing helmets doing brass rubbings and breaking rules for the sake of a photo op.
"you know, of course that at the time these helmets were worn they wouldn't have been considered very comical."
my voice is making a comeback which is nice not being able to sing along to songs in the car or have anybody understand what i'm saying ever was starting to wear on me. i didn't think i was somebody who got sick a lot. today i wondered when i woke up and couldn't even swallow.
"you think about a lot of things you don't say out loud, don't you?"
oh i don't know that i have a lot of secrets anymore. i have feelings sometimes. somedays are hard. is it taboo to reference a break up on my now very public blog? well we broke up. i don't know that i'm an especially independent person but what little of it i have practiced in the last month has been nice. somedays are lonely. somedays the thought of approaching any boy ever wears me out. somedays i am so okay with being somebody who spends her nights with her books. most of the time though honestly, i don't think so much about it. i don't know if this means i'm callous or that i'm just growing up. maybe they are synonymous.
we go to international cinema where the polish ones are too heavy to handle after a day of listening to the beatles. so we watch ridiculous amounts of laguna beach. i remember the delight i take in awkward single lds social encounters. boys that talk passionately about ties. free desserts. forgetting names.
"you're like artsy hip, and i'm like music hip"
tonight i spent time on the trampoline remembering skills i used to have and fears that never really leave me. but lying on our backs between ariels and backhandsprings looking at the tangled mess of trees and power lines in our backyard makes for a nice tuesday evening.
"i fall in love twice a day, so what? there's got to be something more important."
"well what is more important then?"
"i guess i don't know."
6 comments:
Welcome back.
Have I ever told you how rockin your blog's background design is? Believe it, sister.
Oh and you're, like, intimidatingly cool and wise.
Whoever Jordyn is...ditto. LOVE to read your stuff, so keep writing.
I really liked the structure of this post--the build up to the last lines created a nice significance. And everyone else has said it, too, but please keep sharing your writing.
might i have your writing skills, please? these days i just sound like a maternal drip. blah blah blah.
"hello, my name is Charles, but you may call me Sir Charles. I live here in my Canterbury bridge tower, and I like to dress up in Medieval armour and reenact Chaucer's Pardoner's Tale every night before I retire to my bed made of straw."
"Oh, all right, stay on the roof then."
Canterbury canterbury canterbury.
I <3 C-BURY.
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