so i have experienced recent frustration and discouragement regarding my writing. i'm good at using pretty words but really, no one ever knows what it means (including myself). one of my poems was critiqued in class and everyone kind of said the same thing: sounds cool, but i have no idea what it's about. this is not the purpose of writing or poetry. so... i'm frustrated.
also today, while listening to the ridiculous boy in my advanced writing class (the same one who asked one day if it was right that an overweight bishop could hold a person back from getting a reccomend who might struggle with drinking a little when it is obvious that the bishop is breaking the word of wisdom by being obese. are you kidding me? he also likes to drop as often as he can that he is a sports journalist and can write this many words in a short amount of time. he's better than us.) anyway. so i listened to him and this other kid (and when i say kid i guess i mean man because they are both older than i and married.) talk and argue about sports (particularly baseball). they both knew a lot about what they were saying. and i became discouraged.
is there anything in my life that i could really talk that much about?
i'm not an expert on anything.
so now i am bugged.
and i want to find a hobby that i can be an expert at.
possible candidates:
books (sort of)
music (but i only know what i like. i don't know that much about genres or bands or origins of things. i just like music and making mixes.)
being boring (i'm good at talking and sitting and planning my days around what i will eat)
worrying about things beyond my control
making my bed everyday
wearing five layers everyday (i have to credit marcie for this expertise though. i learned from the best)
making plans and never carrying them out (i.e. any "party" i have tried to throw together in the last month)
over-analyzing people
making delicious spinach and chicken wraps (i am healthy)
all things i'm good at and may be able to reach expert level in. ended a sentence with a preposition. don't care.
other things on my mind:
-possibly minoring in linguistics? everytime my theory of language teacher talks about the history of english, where things came from, why we pronounce things the way we do, etc etc i am so interested.
why oh why must everything that interests me have no real application?
-i am tired of people that take personal offense when they find out i'm transferring to byu. "why??!" um. because i want to? (really it's because i haven't gotten married yet. byui doesn't seem to yield any results there for me so i thought i'd give byu a try. that is a lie. but people have honestly asked me if that is the reason.)
-i am now, and will continue to be a freakout through and through.
-i am officially a joanna newsom convert.
-i have never seen so much snow. if i stood in it, i am sure it would come to my waist. but we will never cancel class, never!
fin.
2 comments:
Okay, I remember hearing of a conversation Robert Frost had with a critic about his poem "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening". The critic was trying to assign some deep symbolic meaning to the poem and Frost reportedly said, (and I paraphrase, because I wasn't there) "No, I really was just writing about stopping by the woods on a snowy evening."
Having a passion for beautiful language is not only important but Necessary for beautiful poetry. And other people don't have to understand. Remember Robert!!
Alas, I have no words of wisdom on the writing or the hobby -- although I like your writing, if that's worth a penny in your pocket.
What's up with that guy and the Bishop? Sigh. Was he serious?
Maybe when you come to visit me we can stay up late discussing hobbies, because I don't have one, either. Cory worries about me and says I should do scrapbooking. I DO NOT LIKE scrapbooking. Bleh.
I should really call you sometime. Love you, Al.
And, if Ricks were a 4-year when I were there, I probably would've still transferred to BYU, too. Loved Ricks...also loved BYU.
The end.
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