the great unveiling

okay guys.

i've had a few requests for this.

and what can i say, i'm a pleaser.

taking maternity photos is rough. after 5 minutes with photo booth this is the best i could come up with:

me at 29 weeks. say hi baby.

(thought the vignetting made up for the lack of nekkidness in terms of maternity pictures)

you're welcome. i thought i might as well do it now before i am HUGE, a point that feels not so far away because i seriously get bigger everyday.

pregnancy has been kind of a funny journey for me. i've always been someone who knew i'd have children SOMEDAY, but i never really thought about it much beyond that. the day i found out i was pregnant was crazy town. i'd been praying and wondering what i was supposed to do with my life post-graduation. going to grad school didn't feel right anymore, i hated my job (still do. i run the place now. another story for another time), and i had no idea what i wanted to do with my life. so i kept asking Heavenly Father for something to give me some direction.

He was like, "oh you want something to do? okay here's a baby." and i was like "whaaaaaa????!!!" though i didn't really have a life plan, what little of it i did have for the next two years was thrown completely out the window. i freaked. i was going to be a mom. me. alison. alison who talks to her 3-year-old nephew the same way she talks to anyone else. alison who panics when people hand her a baby to hold. alison whose diet consists of quesadillas, pb&j, pizza, and mac and cheese. alison who has never thought about motherhood except in a very vague, far off distance future way. alison who is grossed out by pregnancy and labor/delivery.

all of those alisons. anyway it took me a few months to wrap my mind around the idea. after awhile though, it became apparent for so many reasons that this was exactly what was supposed to happen for wes and i when it did.

at the second ultrasound, where we actually got to see baby and her perfect nose and perfect mouth and perfect everything i was suddenly SO excited to meet her. i was so impatient. so happy that this little person was going to come into our lives in the next few months. so amazed that an actual baby was living and growing inside of me. so grateful for the way she's already bonded wes and i and caused me to step outside myself just a little bit more.

anyway. a lot of feelings. a lot of blog posts i've thought about. like how excited i am baby is a girl and how important it is to me that she grows up knowing what that REALLY means not what everything and everyone else might tell her it means.

so all of the sleeplessness, throwing up, acne, facial hair (ew), and looking at my body thinking "when did that happen?" aside, being pregnant has been pretty nice. though i don't LOVE pregnancy and i'm way more excited to actually hang out with baby than i am to carry her inside me, i'm grateful for where i am and what i have right now.

just some more weeks. 11. hopefullymaybelessthan11.