work.

the quickest way to make me want to die:

stand three feet from me and stare at me.
while you're staring/hovering you could eat an apple. and by "eat" i mean chomp, slurp, slurp chomp slurp sluuuuuuuurp.
maybe ask some passive aggressive questions that suggest you think i'm some kind of mind-reading magician.
a good cherry-topper might be to play only a top 40 radio station that alternates between katY perry, taylor swift, and "hey, soul sister."